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My parents are going on a cruise to the Caribbean. My dad sent me this email to make sure I got the “memo.” Zoey and Hugo are the family dogs…
Matt.: When we are on vacation, please pay attention to following things…..
A. For your brother and sister — Zoey and Hugo
- Everyday you need to replace the fresh water to them
- Close all room doors if you are not at home. Otherwise they will go in to break the wire, cable and furniture in pieces. Worse case they will drop pii and poo inside.
- Replace the dirty paper with clean one immediately, otherwise they will not make poo pii on the top.
- Don’t put your plastic sandles on the floor they like to tear them in pieces.
- Everynight clean their faces, legs and ass. Comb them and brush their teeth much better.
B. Monday, Wednesday and Friday come to my shop to feed my fish once a time.
C. For the house
- Aunt Cecilia has a spare house key if you forget to bring your door key out.
- Please set the temperature above 80 degree if you are not at home.
- Watch the gas burner completely off when you go out.
- Every Tuesday don’t park the car in our side, every Monday don’t park the car opposite side.
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I sent my dad a video of me skydiving. He emailed me back the following…
oh my god,
rona, it is really danger game, pls stop it !
think about ur mom, when she 85 years old, who will cook for her, and who will wash her diapers ?
i am too old at that time. pls stop any danger game now .
peace / safe / health .
b.rgds
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I was shopping for beds, and I emailed my dad a canopy one with white drapes. This was his response…
“You know most Chinese decorate their house or bed this way when a family person die at home. When I sleep on this bed, and wake up at night, I would immediately jump out of the window close to me.”
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Me: Baba there are no walmarts near LA HAHAHA. So please buy the panoramic mirror if you see it!! <3 *panormaic mirror is the big mirror you place over your rearview mirror in your car to check your blindspots*
Dad: K. What’s this mean less than 3? I bought two, is it ok? One for you and another for your mom
Me: -____- it means heart!
Dad: Haha. I thought u let me buy less than three if I found. Actually, I did bought 2 la. Why don’t u talk to me? Only typing words
Dad: I love you.<3
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My dad wanted to make sure that we kept the toaster oven clean. It’s ironic because he is the messiest person living in the house…
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Upon hearing of my law school acceptance…
SA! I declare myself the PROUDEST and the most FORTUNATE dad on the face of this earth…….I hope you agree with me!
Deep in my heart I know, you will make this world a better place than it is………..i love you, sooooooooo,soooooooo much!!!!!!
daddy
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Daddy: Had a long snap?
Me: Yeah. Sup?
Daddy: What sup
Me: It’s an abbrev for what’s up?
Daddy: Nup
Daddy: For nothing is up
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Dad: ~_~
Me: haha hello!
Dad: What did you eat?
Me: i had this fried turkey with curry sauce
Me: its so yummy
Dad: Sound good. They have a lot of curry dishes.
Dad: Cook by the currian.
Me: huh?
Dad: I made up Currian means curry people.
Dad: Get it.
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My dad got one of those spam emails about sending money. While most people just delete them, my dad of course, responds…
MSG SUBJECT: DO GET BACK TO ME
From: (my dad)
My friend you are a very lucky person. I just found a golden mine outside of Bogota, Colombia. Y need people to join money and forces to get all that gold. Would you like to join me. All you need is to send me $2500 and you are in. This is the chance you were waiting all you life. I have a hole buch for rusty shovels and I need the money to get new ones. Lucking foward to have yoy as my favorite parter.
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Dad: ~_~
Me: hi!
Me: why do you always make that face?
Dad: That is mommy.
Me: oh haha
Me: hi mommy!
Dad: I mean her face
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