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Today my dad was fixing our doorbell, which makes an obnoxious imitation of the Big Ben. My dog got very upset and started barking at it. This was my dad’s response:
“What’s wrong doggy? You don’t like the Big Bang? That’s what it’s called right? The Big Bang in London?”

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While my friends are over and my mom’s not around, my dad reads through the shopping list before heading out. He shouts from the kitchen:
“What’s this? What’s P-A-D-S? Why got wings? What always?”

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My dad posted this on his facebook after his team Argentina lost to Germany in the world cup this year:
“It has not been a very good day for me, first my favourite soccer team lost in a humiliating way, and then my daughters soccer team in ohio lost the first two games. to over come my sadness i had alot of tabasco sauce.”

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My dad, whose name is Mario, just texted my mom, my brother and me the following message:
“Can we do dinner tonight? it’s cinco de mario! Daddy”

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I’ve been struggling with a few aspects in my life, and recently my Dad has been reaching out to bridge the cultural/generation gap. He started to learn how to text and I received a text that read exactly:
“U mom get job anne u is my hope what even do not worry keep happy everydays keep eye on he farway what even u want i am support”
Another night, my dad saw me walking to my car at midnight and thought I was sneaking out when I was only trying to get baseball tickets from a friend. He decided to come with me and then shared his philosophy on life:
“Bitter first, sweet later. Cannot run away!”
I love my dad!

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After re-watching the terminator movies, My dad sent me the following text:
“Eis teli vista bebi.”

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Dad: Bicki, what does EWWW mean? I know LOL means Laughing Out Loud, but I can’t figure out what EWWW means.

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My dad’s English is pretty good, but sometimes he just says things and you are like whaaaaaat? The other day, he was talking to my sister in-law on the phone, who recently got into Harvard for graduate school. This was my dad’s reaction:
Dad, “So I heard you got into Harvard for graduate school, that is very….uhhh…. adequate.”

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my dad sent me some weird email w/ some disgusting pics in it. and his preface to the email was this:
“Be Brave to look at it.”

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I called my Dad to wish him Happy Birthday. It turns out my parents were out shopping at the outlets.
He said, “I’m in the car waiting. You know your Mom. Always shopping. First for handbags at the Dooney Dooney. Then Coach something. Coach First Class, whatever.”