me: mommy
me: whats up!
Mommy: I am not your mommy. i am your daddy and checking her e- mail
{ 4 comments }
me: mommy
me: whats up!
Mommy: I am not your mommy. i am your daddy and checking her e- mail
{ 4 comments }
The following is an unsolicited email from my father, with a subject line of “Useful Information”:
1) College freshmen: Larks (early to bed and early riser), owls (late to bed and late riser), robins (in between Larks and Owls). Grade point average for Larks 3.18 Owls 2.84.
2) 1990s, Public Health Department at JHU discovered that taking zinc tablets can stop diarrhea. Exact mechanism is not known. Each year diaherria killed 1.6 million children in Africa and Asia.
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My last boyfriend generally wore pants and shorts that stayed at his waist…but he had one pair of shorts that were a couple of sizes too large, and he happened to be wearing them while watching a movie at my house with me and my family. In the middle of the movie, my dad abruptly left the room. He returned a few minutes later with his huge industrial staple gun.
Dad: If you come in to my house ever again with pants that are hanging down like that, I promise I will staple them where they are supposed to be.
Boyfriend: *silence*
Dad: Okay?
Boyfriend: Okay.
{ 8 comments }
My mom and I were vacationing in Australia when we received this email from my dad back at home…
Lucky Ni just broke into our house, and ate most Jonathan’s breakfast for this coming week:
12 pcs crossant (the entire pack) and 1 poncake [pound cake]. I just got from Costco this afternoon with Jason.
He just sat far away from us and couldn’t move any more, like a snake after swallowing a whole cattle, too big to move.
Wan-Ba-Dan!!!
Took me half an hour to clean the kitchen and the family room.
He can live up to 100 years old!
{ 2 comments }