(165 votes, average: 4.68 out of 5)
Loading ...So my toilet broke and my dad wrote a sign on it; it reads:
CAUTION!
NO SHIT (ddong)
ONLY URINATION (ohh jeum)
{ 5 comments }
December 2009
(165 votes, average: 4.68 out of 5) Loading ...
(144 votes, average: 2.88 out of 5) Loading ...My dad has been in America for a long time, but his understanding of idioms and phrases is still limited.
Me: Frank Sinatra could sing for a long time.
Dad: Yeah, he could really belch it out.
Me: Belch? What the hell?
Dad: Yeah.
Me: I fucking love Lady Gaga.
Dad: She’s just a flash in the pants.
Dad: He’s butt-naked.
Me: Butt-naked? Isn’t it buck-naked?
Dad: That doesn’t make any sense.
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(183 votes, average: 4.76 out of 5) Loading ...My dad is a gift-giver, and he recently presented me with these three gifts after a business trip to Shanghai. The middle koala thing is a little four-holed out of tune ocarina necklace, and the koala is glued on, so there’s no getting rid of it quietly… PS, I am 21 years old.
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(185 votes, average: 4.81 out of 5) Loading ...After starting a new job I did really well with one customer and they sent in an email praising me specifically and chuffed I forwarded it to my Dad to show him how well I was doing. He replied…
You are lovely.
How does it feel to be an asset?
Try not to depreciate :)
Love, dods.
xxxxxxxxxx
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(114 votes, average: 3.49 out of 5) Loading ...my dad sent me some weird email w/ some disgusting pics in it. and his preface to the email was this:
“Be Brave to look at it.”
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(214 votes, average: 4.73 out of 5) Loading ...I called my Dad to wish him Happy Birthday. It turns out my parents were out shopping at the outlets.
He said, “I’m in the car waiting. You know your Mom. Always shopping. First for handbags at the Dooney Dooney. Then Coach something. Coach First Class, whatever.”
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(168 votes, average: 4.68 out of 5) Loading ...We asked our parents to officiate at our wedding. When it was my father-in-law’s turn to speak, he looked around proudly and recited…
“Who takes this broad to be his lawfully wedded wife?”
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(75 votes, average: 3.92 out of 5) Loading ...Dear J,
It is an advice that after each lunch meal, you drink some water, before swallow in, to use your tong to go around teeth and to clean them, if you don’t brush them after meal. It is realy good practice to keep your teeth healthy for long term.
Love,
Dad
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(202 votes, average: 3.89 out of 5) Loading ...My parents and I were getting ready to go out. My dad was trying to take his murse (male purse) and I was giving him a hard time about it, so he decided to forgo the murse. Later on before we left, he saw me grab my very own purse… and so goes this convo
Dad: hey YOU’re carrying a purse.
Me: dad’s it’s okay because I am a girl
Dad: well that’s a SEXY remark.
Me: huh?
Mom: you mean SEXIEST, yubo.
Me: whaat? you fobs, you mean SEXIST?!!
Dad: yeah that word.
{ 7 comments }
(264 votes, average: 4.79 out of 5) Loading ...My sister was talking to my dad about a friend on fb who posted a somewhat offensive note and keeps trying to IM her.
Sister: He’s so annoying–I just ignore him all the time.
Dad: Why don’t you deface him?
Sister: Really?
Dad: Yea! I do it all the time!
*Silence*
Sister: You mean “unfriend” him?
Dad: But it’s FACE-book.
{ 4 comments }