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Watermelons Have Buttholes?

Posted on August 23, 2009 at 12:08am

Dad: Hey, isn’t this yellow watermelon so sweet?
Me: Yea, it’s pretty good.
Dad: You know how I choose it?
Me: You slap the watermelon, right? And pound it?
Mom: Yes, you have to slap the watermelon to see if there is juice.
Dad: NOOOPE. That’s not how you do it.
Me: Then how do you do it?
Dad: YOU POKE THE BUTTHOLE. AND IF THE BUTTHOLE IS HARD, THEN IT IS GOOD. IF THE BUTTHOLE IS SOFT, IT IS NO GOOD.

According to him, 10 out of 10 times it has worked.

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Tags: asian dads, asian humor, fob, fobby, mdiaf, my dad is a fob, watermelon

Filed Under: Conversations

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(272 votes, average: 4.89 out of 5)

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Xenobiologista

Yeah it's the end that the flower used to be attached to.
katie k.

He's right! With melons, you want to check the "butthole," it is far more reliable than thumping the side. For a perfect cantaloupe, you want a fragrant butthole that gives a bit when you push it. I'm totally serious!
Van

knock on the watermelon, not pound.
mabes

My dad was talking about the little tiny dot that is NOT the stem, but on the opposite side of that.

oh, and my dad complained that i misquoted him, "firm" not hard.
Izzy

Butthole? What is he talking about?

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