My Dad is a Fob

Pulled a Rush Hour 3

Posted on June 30, 2009 at 01:26am

My Dad was calling the car insurance company. The lady asks, who’s policy is this? My dad goes, “I am Yu.” She hangs up.

Street Hookahs

Posted on June 30, 2009 at 01:22am

Our dad smokes a lot so me and my sisters were trying to slyly convince him to get into some hookah. We thought he knew what we were talking about. He didn’t.

Us: Yeah there’s lots of places downtown where you could get hookah.
Dad: Mmhhmm like on the streets.
Us: Uhh yeah in those lounges.
Dad: But the ones on the corner, they’re so expensive.
Us: Which hookah in the corner?
Dad: Her name is Candy.

Asian Dad Bike Brigade

Posted on June 30, 2009 at 01:17am

Complete with not completely rubbed in SPF 50…for total coverage.

When You Were a Sperm…

Posted on June 30, 2009 at 01:13am

When watching an old video during my dad’s company picnic…

me: hey dad, when was that?
Dad: 1988. You haven’t been born yet.

-pause-

Dad: (turns to brother) You know, you were still a sperm.

Not Subtle at All

Posted on June 30, 2009 at 01:12am

Min Joung,

I am forwrding an article about dealing with control freaks.
It may help you understand and deal with your mom.

Dad

Sherlock doesn’t stand a chance

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 02:36am

My dad left for the airport to go overseas this morning. Later, I received this text from him before his connecting flight in LA:

“I m / n, g ^k f GRE”

At first I thought there was something wrong with the text. I called him back immediately and found out that the forward slash meant “up” and he was wishing me luck on the GRE.

“I am up (boarding) now, good luck for GRE”

First Name (No) Last Name

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 02:33am

I have a friend who’s middle name is “No”, because when her dad was filling out her birth certificate, there was no middle name for her, so that’s what he wrote.

U Ho!

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 02:30am

My dad was once called Comcast and the client services rep asked him to spell his name.

My dad started, trying to be as clear as possible, “G for GOO. U for UHO…”

“U Ho??” The rep was so confused.

I finally had to step in “G for GooD (no silent D), U for U HAUL…”

Financially Saavy Buffets

Posted on June 23, 2009 at 02:28am

Dad: buffet bought Suncor!
Me: huh? which one?
Dad: Suncor, you know, the canadian oil sands
Me: yea, I know, but which buffet? Can buffets even buy stock?
Dad: yea, buffet buys stock all the time
Me: Which buffet? Crazy Buffet?
Dad:…er…no, Warren Buffet.
Me: OHHH, you mean Warren BuffeTT. As in Buh-FET, not Bufay

GPS isn’t fob-proof

Posted on June 17, 2009 at 05:58am

text message from my brother:

“Dad couldn’t find any entries on fisherman’s wharf on the gps.  I took it from him and i looked at what he typed. It said, “fisherman wharp.”