My Dad is a Fob

Bad Haircut

Posted on May 29, 2009 at 04:05pm

I got bold hear and mom is not willing.
I am sorry, I can wear wig.

Love,
Dad

Come to my FEAST*

Posted on May 26, 2009 at 10:25pm

My dad wanted to invite our extended family to our house for dinner, so he texted everyone:

“Come to my house at 7 tonight, I will give you a good fist!”

Folks needed

Posted on May 26, 2009 at 10:24pm

my dad’s picnic signup sheet said:

paper plates
styrofoam cups
plastic knives
plastic spoons
plastic folks

For YOU, honourable grandchild

Posted on May 26, 2009 at 10:22pm

So, this is technically from my grandpa… but I thought it was so funny and cute! Below is what the card says:

We are so happy that YOU to graduate Master Degree from Teacher Shool of Columbia University with great success and honours!
Grandma gave you $15 to you as we met together in the restaurant – Yum’s Bistro. It was a joke! We hope you forget this matter, otherwise you may reserve this joke in your mind.
My heartiest congratulation again!

With love,
Grandparent.

A. love that they sign it grandparent
B. Grandparents playing pranks? Amazing. I was confused by the $15 as well… as my grandma followed me to the restroom so to not allow my parents to see her give me the money….
C. use of honours… not only FOB but British now as well

Proud photographer

Posted on May 26, 2009 at 10:16pm

My dad sent me this email with the subject line “fruit tray picture i took”:

Annie:

How are things going? I have attched a picture of fruit tray mom made for Joe today. I like the color cpmbination. You may use it for desktop background.

Dode

Homicidal piercing?

Posted on May 26, 2009 at 10:14pm

scene: trying to get permission from my dad to get a lip piercing

me: heyyy so i wanted to ask you something
dad: yes?
me: i was wondering if i could get a lip piercing…i’ve wanted one for a couple years and i’ve thought about it and i really want one
dad: well…do you want halabujee (grandpa) to see your cow ring face and get seizure and die?

o t b r h

Posted on May 26, 2009 at 10:12pm

I was on the bus ride home from my swim meet. My dad texts me, and asks:

Dad: W a u n?

It took me a while to figure it out.

(where are you now?)

Unhappy 200th belated-birthday to Darwin

Posted on May 26, 2009 at 10:11pm

After recent holidays, the approval of prop 8, and general boredom, I told my parents that I would no longer go to church on holidays for them. Conversation went as follows:

ME: I just… I don’t want to go anymore. I only go for you guys. But it’s… it’s just AGAINST my beliefs.
MOM: But you still believe in god, right?!
ME: well… You don’t have to believe in god to be a good person… I’m still me…
DAD: (in roaring angry voice) WHAT?! HOW DO YOU THINK YOU GOT HERE?! SCIENCE?!?

Free Huge!

Posted on May 22, 2009 at 11:52pm

So I return from school and walk into the living room and my dad is standing there—obviously after watching that Youtube Free Hugs video—holding that piece of paper.

Of course, he first held up the erroneous one, on which he wrote ’Free Huge’, and after correcting him (and laughing for a few minutes) he made a new one and posed for this picture.

Wounded pride

Posted on May 22, 2009 at 11:47pm

reacting to my late acceptance offer from a grad school

“Tell them ‘early bird get the meal’, find somebody else.”