(700 votes, average: 4.89 out of 5)
Loading ...So my dad and I were finishing up a road trip and we were at the Canada/US border.
Customs Agent: Do you have anything to declare?
Dad: No
Customs Agent: No drugs? Alcohol? Firearms?
Dad: We bought lots of coke. BIG pack of coke.
Customs Agent: Sir?
Me: He means this (I point to the 24-pack of Coke in our back seat)
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(362 votes, average: 4.88 out of 5) Loading ...This is an email dialogue between my father and me:
ME: Hello!
DAD: I am fine.
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(251 votes, average: 4.83 out of 5) Loading ...As my dad was driving, i decided to turn on the radio. The song “Superfreak” by Rick James came on. And in the midst of the chorus, I heard:
Dad: She’s sugar-free, sugar-free. She’s su-gah free-eee
Me: Uh… dad? That’s not how they sing it.
Dad: But it’s about gum.
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(164 votes, average: 4.12 out of 5) Loading ...At a restaurant….
Waiter: and sir what will you have?
Dad: mezzatuccini
—waiter looking confused—-
Me: pa, did you just make that up?
Dad: no
Me: is it on the menu?
Dad: no
—my whole family including the waiter now confused—
Me: what is that you ordered then?
Dad: you know….. mezzatuccini!
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(98 votes, average: 4.00 out of 5) Loading ...So I was able to get my dad, myself, my cousin and my aunt all together in a chat room and somehow, the subject turned to how my aunt is still not married. Therefore, my dad offered his opinion on how she might be able to better find a husband.
Dad: I think east winter more severe so come closer easy
Dad: Stella move to NY
Dad: CA. is too hot already. move out ! Don’t touch me
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