One day, my dad was speeding aimlessly while taking me to Michigan for a
college visit. Not long after he started hitting speeds of 100 mph, a cop
pulled my dad over.
My dad, ever so calm in such situations and so over getting “American
speeding tickets,” decided to take the situation into his own hands… or
really, his own bowels. Just before the officer could ask for my dad’s
license and registration, he ripped out a long, wet fart and told the cop in
his broken English, “Man, I gotta go!” To this, the officer replied, “Go,
My dad then sped off in what we now call his gassy getaway.