Friday, January 16, 2009

Gassy Getaway

January 16, 2009

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One day, my dad was speeding aimlessly while taking me to Michigan for a
college visit. Not long after he started hitting speeds of 100 mph, a cop
pulled my dad over.

My dad, ever so calm in such situations and so over getting “American
speeding tickets,” decided to take the situation into his own hands… or
really, his own bowels. Just before the officer could ask for my dad’s
license and registration, he ripped out a long, wet fart and told the cop in
his broken English, “Man, I gotta go!” To this, the officer replied, “Go,
man, go!”

My dad then sped off in what we now call his gassy getaway.

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Euerybody can Driue

January 16, 2009

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my dad sent this text message to my sister in regards to her driving. he
apparently confused the “u” key with the “v” key.

“You can drive euerybody can driue but before they driue do they euer
asking themself is euerything ready yet? Not only filled up gas ignited
engine step on padal but how about tire air electric system lubricant system
etc. If you are mature enough or not! Do not blame me too noisy!”

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